I want euthanasia.

There are no long-term treatment facilities (that I'm aware of) for people suffering from bpd unless you are rich or have good insurance (I only have Medicare and Medicaid). I just got out of my 8th hospitalization a couple weeks ago. I have decided that it is improbable that I will ever get help, and I am tired of suffering. I beg for death every day. I have no future. Most of my friends are dead. The ones left don't have anything to do with me. I have a toxic relationship with my entire family. I can't get a job. I can't enjoy television, video games, or anything. I was okay when I was in the psych hospital, but that's just a temporary fix. I want it to be over. People have gotten legal euthanasia in Europe for similar conditions (I have schizoaffective, PTSD, ADHD, and fibromyalgia in addition to BPD). I don't think it's fair that I have to suffer. The only reason I haven't already ended my suffering is because I'm scared. But if I had trained professionals help me, I wouldn't be.